September 6, 2007
My final guest today is the totally fabulous, awesome writer, Diana Peterfreund. And how cool is Diana’s photo….. she’s holding my book!!!!!!
First of all, thanks so much, Sara, for inviting me to celebrate the launch of THE SECOND VIRGINITY OF SUZY GREEN with you. I had so much fun reading your book!
My “fresh start” came when I moved from the school where I’d attended most of elementary and middle school to the one where I attended high school. I was pretty miserable in 5-8th grade, but looking back, I suppose that most kids could say that about their early adolescence. It’s definitely not a fun time. I had very few friends at all during those years, and a bunch of people I went to school with were openly hostile. Bullying was, if not encouraged, definitely overlooked by the administration. In some cases, the teachers seemed to cheer on the offenders. Classrooms were divided based on assessment tests that the children took in early elementary. People were put in “high, middle, and low” reading and math classes, and there they were to stay all the way through high school. Can you imagine taking a test at eight that determined whether or not you were going to be able to take advanced math or science when you were seventeen?
Neither could my parents. They fought tooth and nail to get me placed in higher level courses as it became apparent that my aptitude warranted it, and neither the teachers nor the other students appreciated our trying to buck the system. So when I realized, at fourteen, that I was looking at another four years of this crap, I made one of the smartest decisions of my twenty-eight years: I went to my parents and begged them to let me change schools.
Starting high school at a new place made me extremely nervous. Like Suzy, I was very conscious about my opportunity for a fresh start. Would I impress teachers? Would I make friends? And, like Suzy, I learned that the “rules” at my new school were totally different. People had academic advisors to help them devise a class schedule, and if they wanted to take a more challenging class than the faculty rep advised, they could argue why without anyone else in the school knowing (unless they wanted to confide in their friends). You weren’t a “jock” or a “brain” or an “artsy type.” One soccer team starter was also the lead in the school play and another was in the band, and the captain of the wrestling team was in all my A.P. classes and ended up at an Ivy League school. One of the most popular kids in my grade was a renowned choir music singer. Of course we had social cliques and dramas — what group of adolescents doesn’t? But the fact that I saw how different the rules were from school to school made me realize, early on, that these “rules” were pretty much crap.
Nothing was “cool” in and of itself. At one school, the cool kids might be jocks and cheerleaders, but at another school, it was the drama club set, and at another, the folks in the band would never be called “geeks.” It was the people that made the activity cool. Being able to recognize that made me more open to activities I might never have tried because I was too scared to think it wasn’t “cool” or “done.”
How cool is that?
Comment here to win a copy of Diana’s second book, UNDER THE ROSE.
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Diana Peterfreund is the author of SECRET SOCIETY GIRL and UNDER THE ROSE, both available from Bantam Dell. Her next book, RITES OF SPRING (BREAK) will be out in June of 2008. She’s currently working on a novel about deadly, maneating unicorns that can only be killed by girls on their *first* virginity.
Posted by Sara Hantz in Uncategorized @ 8:21 pm
Pat Posner Says:
Hi, Diana
“Under the Rose” – such a great title because it took me down Memory Lane to a Malcolm Saville book that was a favourite of mine like, erm, half a century ago when I was very young . His book was called The Sign of the Alpine Rose.
I was (still am) such a bookworm, I can’t remember if that was thought to be cool or uncool at the time but nothing could’ve put me off reading and collecting books.
As the Witches know, I still have quite a few of the books from those days – and I haven’t stopped adding to them.
Wendy Says:
Thats wonderful that at such a young age you realized it was the people, and not the rules that made your school what it was. Too often you find so many get frustrated with the “system” , affecting their lives in someway.
Maneating unicorns?! Oh this I have to read !
Emily Marshall Says:
Great story Diana. Sounds like you made the right decision. And it is really funny how popularity is so different in schools. I went to a small school, so all our cliques were crossed over. I think mainly because by the time you went to school with someone for 12 years in a row (which most everyone had), then you tend to switch to many times of friends, based on your interests, at different times of your life.
Also, I haven’t read Under the Rose, yet. But it’s on my to be read list!!!
jenna Says:
I enjoyed reading your story which brought back memories. Your understanding of the importance of the people themselves and who they were really struck me as unique and great. Being able to realize that you had to change schools to survive was probably the best thing that you could do in order to achieve. I look forward to this great novel and all the best.
Bonnie Ferguson Says:
Good for you, Diana! I’m glad your second school was so much better
Barrie Summy Says:
I’m always amazed at how what’s cool at one junior high or high school can be the complete opposite at another. My sisters and I have kids the same ages, and they all go to different schools. Very interesting…
Jessica Burkhart Says:
Very cool, Diana. I’m all for diversity and why can’t the soccer jock date the tuba player?
Great post.
Teresa W. Says:
Glad to have you here today I visit and love your blog I visit it daily!
pearl Says:
Reading about your experiences gave me insight into how school has such an influence upon our feelings and our entire future. It was gratifying to hear that you did switch schools. Many times that is the major obstacle. My school days were not enjoyable. Perhaps agony and upsetting. Glad that they are way behind me now. BTW, I just love your novel and will be enjoying it soon.
Cherie J Says:
Good for you! Sounds like you made a great decision in switching schools. Glad it worked out for you.
amanda ashby Says:
Diana – you’re sooooo cool – not only was it a great story but an equally great photo!!!! Btw, I’ve just got to say that Rites of Spring (Break) is just about the best title that I’ve heard!!!!!
Cheryl S. Says:
I agree – middle school was the worst. I was happiest in grade school and high school. The teenage years are so hard.
Sue A. Says:
The school years are very important years and they can mark a child forever so I think parents should be considering if their child’s school is right for them. I’m glad you made the switch and I wonder how you could have the foresight at such an early age or the strength to stand up to your parents. Wow!
Vicki L Says:
Thanks for sharing your story of middle school and high school years. It’s so true about the people who make the ‘cool’. I worked at a High School for 6 years and there it was the drama kids. I will say this for them, they were great kids who while being the cool kids they still had time for others.
For me working there was like re-living my high school years without the stress. I always had kids in my office and worked with the drama group, even acted in a couple of plays each year (they needed an older person)
Anyway, the books sounds great Sara!!! I can’t wait to read it.
Jammer Says:
Bravo to you and your parents. How I wished I’d been able to change high schools. Mine was in a very segregated suburb outside of Detroit. I knew that the open prejudices expressed by so many there were wrong, wrong, wrong, yet my parents never would’ve considered pulling me out of that school.
On one occasion when a friend of mine made a particularly bigoted remark, all I could say in stunned reply was, “But Pammy, you’re in AP math!” (I couldn’t comprehend the notion that someone could be brainy and a racist. ‘Pammy’ wasn’t her real name, btw.)
Tracey Says:
This subject is near and dear to me. I also think the rules are crap and I don’t know how kids come up with them. I worry about these later years for my son, if he doesn’t fit the mold, so to speak. I can already tell he’s not the jock type and that is very big in this school system. I was never impressed with that. I mean looks wise, yes, but had much more fun with the funny, slighly goofy ones. Not to mention, later in life, the nerds make more money;) GO GEEKS!!! lol
Aimee Says:
Awesome post!
ellie Says:
Most kids seem to find their niche, although it is tough when you do not fit in with the popular crowd. As long as you do excel academically that is all that matters, although I am sure that the sports fiends would never agree with that thought. No wonder so few attend reunions. Who wants to be reminded of their difficulties encountered at high school.
Christina Phillips Says:
Diana your story reminded me of my school days – we were also put into streamed classes at age 11 and that was IT. Never mind whether the pupil actually improved her grades in later years. We had to really fight the system just so I could be ‘allowed’ to sit the O Level exam in English Lit and Lang. The response from the ed dept was basically okay but don’t blame us if she ends up with no grade at all!
I got As. The Head of English Dept blanked me for the rest of the year. Oh yeah happy days!!
catslady Says:
Ahhh if only we could start out with what we know now. I usually figure things out too late – good for you.
RobynL Says:
a very touching story and I’m glad it worked out. Would love to read Under the Rose.
Vanessa Says:
Great post, Diana. I’m glad your decision paid off. My primary (elementary) school tried a similar set-up when I was in Grade 4. Every few weeks there’d be a very public shuffling of students as we were sent to different areas of the classroom based on test results. Humiliating stuff if you were downgraded.
David Paradise Says:
I can relate, Diana. When I was in elementary school, they made us take a bunch of “placement” tests, and because of my test scores, I was segregated from my classmates for most of the day and put off in a separate room with a teacher’s aide. Looking back, I realize that it was the best thing for me, but it really sucked at the time.
PatriciaW Says:
Definitely relate, Diana. I remember those tests well. Luckily I was placed in the advanced classes but I lived in a fairly segregated town where that didn’t mean a whole much. We couldn’t afford private school but I could go to another public high school if I passed a test.
My brother and I both begged our parents to let us test and be bused miles away to a school where we knew no one and weren’t particularly wanted (I was one of 8 African-Americans in my graduating class of 350), just so we could be in a place where achievement wasn’t frowned upon or treated like a huge surprise. It was expected. Loads of folks took AP courses and many went on to the Ivys and other top universities. It was scary and it was worth it but I missed my friends and the social activities that we couldn’t participate in because we had to get on the bus headed home.